Auroraskorner

Things I Wish

I wish it was easy

As I sit there picking at my nails

Shaking one leg

And working my jaw wordlessly

I wish it was easy

I wish I could do it

As I walk down the street

Dragging my feet

Eyes threatening to roll back from exhaustion
which has no known source

I wish I could do it

Is it easier for others? Do they wish too?

I ask myself this question as I sit around a table with friends

Friends which laugh, which express themselves with their hands

Friends I stare at

Do they feel how I feel too?

I wish to know

Oh, I so do

So that I can tell myself that I’m not alone

I am not alone in my doubts, in my wonders, in my prayers

Anything

To justify those thoughts that never quiet

These thoughts

That never leave